So you moved into a new neighborhood, and you don’t like the neighbors to the left. Unfortunately, you did not do a neighborhood lookup before moving into your new home.
Or perhaps new neighbors to the right have moved in, and you’re not a fan of their behavior.
The specifics of a lousy neighbor situation may vary, but the fundamental issue remains the same. If your neighbor makes your life a living nightmare, you will need to learn how to handle your bad neighbors with as little escalation and drama as possible.
After all, if you want to get to know your neighbors and live peacefully, you will have to learn to get along with them. Or, at the very least, tolerate your neighbors.
My Thoughts: One of the most fundamental questions you may need to ask yourself if you are in this situation is: “Do I keep the peace, or do I put up a fight?” Let’s talk about this more.
Whether you like it or not, your neighbors are a part of your daily life. You can hear them if they’re partying at night or if they leave their dog barking outside.
You can (unfortunately) see their domestic flights or stress out when their kids right run right in front of your car or steal from your garage.
If your neighbors are rowdy and rude (and perhaps even are a danger to your family), there is no possible way that you can keep the peace without trying to solve the problem because they aren’t peaceful. You need to address the manner and speak with your neighbors. However, you need to approach the situation with extreme caution.
No matter the issue, it is essential to address it in the most mature way possible and develop a solution. And, in some cases, your neighbors aren’t actually “bad.” They might not know that what they are doing affects you and/or your family in a negative manner.
If you properly approach your neighbors, you might be able to solve your issues with them without having to put up any sort of fight or make any neighbor reports to the authorities.
Whatever the issue is, it most likely won’t just go away. I had a lousy neighbor once, and they kept me up at night with a newborn baby who would wake to their loud music.
Their dogs were also quite a nuisance, and they would let them roam free.
Eventually, I did have to discuss my concerns with them, and we worked together to find a solution. My neighbors were annoyed about my complaints. However, they were more than willing to work with me as they wanted to keep the peace. Eventually, they got over our disagreement, and we became closer. I was sad to see them move out two years later.
Approaching your neighbor positively but firmly with your concerns is the first step when you have an issue with a neighbor.
My Thoughts: The last thing you want to do is escalate a problem to the authorities when a simple conversation could solve the issue(s) between you and your neighbor.
In most cases, a person will work with their concerned next-door neighbors to find a solution (and is willing to compromise).
You also have to be willing to compromise with your neighbor if they are willing to work with you.
In my situation, the neighbors changed their behavior and kept the sound of their music and the nights they partied outside to a minimum. As a compromise, we tried to understand the occasional noise so they could still have fun.
My neighbors also kept better tabs on their animals. In return, we tried to understand the occasional barking or wandering over to our house.
If your neighbors aren’t willing to work with you on finding a solution, the next step would be to check your city ordinances and see if they are breaking any laws. You want to try to avoid reporting your neighbor, but it may be necessary.
If you find out your neighbors are violating some city code, you could kindly let them know that they will call the police unless they work with you on a compromise. Let your neighbors know that you will be reporting their behavior if they aren't willing to work things out with you in a civil manner.
My Thoughts: Always approach your neighbor in a kind but firm manner.
And of course, if they still won’t budge, you may need to notify the authorities. Especially if you feel you and/or your family’s mental health or even physical health is in danger, things could get violent depending on your neighbor.
Notifying the authorities is undoubtedly an excellent call to action, especially if you fear for your family’s safety or just well-being in general. The authorities can help you sort things out and will hopefully be the peacekeepers in the situation.
If the above steps don’t work, you may have to sit down with your family and discuss the pros and cons of living in your neighborhood. After all, your neighbors can be annoying or dangerous without actually doing anything illegal.
For example, you could experience subtle hints that your neighbor could be dangerous without having any proof. Or perhaps they are seriously stressful in ways without breaking any laws. If you are at this difficult crossroad, you may need to consider moving.
Having a neighbor that you don’t get along with can be a tricky situation. If you can reach out to your neighbor and come to a solution together, it will make your living experience and possibly even their living experience much more enjoyable.
Having neighbors that you can connect with is extremely important as you typically see your neighbors daily.
However, having a close relationship with your neighbors isn’t always easy. If you were in a challenging situation, my suggestion is to use the steps above to avoid an enormous escalation with your neighbors. That way, you can keep the peace as much as possible. You must be a peacekeeper in your neighborhood.
If nothing can be resolved, you may have to consider moving.